2012: A Personal Reflection
It’s New Year’s Eve, the last day of 2012. I’ve been staring at my computer for about 20 minutes now, wondering, pondering, vegging out, drifting, and reflecting. I’m thinking of all the things that happened, I wanted to happen, and I wish didn’t happen. I’m also thinking about what’s to come. What does 2013 hold for me? I’d like to say that I’m also thinking about what 2013 holds for all of us, but that would be a lie. This is a selfish moment. Right now, I don’t care what happens to all of us. I only care what happens to my family and me. That’s all right. I’m allowed one day (actually, I have many more, but we’ll let that be our little secret).
2012 was a roller-coaster ride, a long, stomach dropping, head spinning of a ride. There were times that I was elated, I’m glad I waited in line, and I wanted to go faster. Of course, there were times that I was done, sick to my stomach, wish I would have sat on the bench next to the line instead and had a pretzel. However, the bad part about sitting on the bench is that you have to listen to everyone talk about how great the ride was later on and you realize that you bought a ticket just to sit around and watch. It goes against my nature not to participate. I want my money’s worth. I want to squeeze every dime of experience out of the price of admission. If not, then what’s the point?
I wore many hats in 2012. I was a ranch hand, a copywriter, a bad carpenter, a painter, a security guard, a floor scrubber, an author, a screenwriter, a reporter, and a blogger. I worked hard at all of them. Some because I had to, others because I wanted to. Each of those hats carried with it other responsibilities and necessities. Not all of them were good, but most were. This was a hard year financially, professionally, emotionally, and spiritually. I wanted to quit everything, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. No matter how bad I wanted to, I just couldn’t find the strength to do it. It wasn’t in me. It still isn’t.
There were highlights to the year. I like highlights. They’re fun. I published my first book, There Is A Season, in March. It was an exciting day. I worked hard on it and I hoped it would be received well. It was. Thank you to everyone who purchased it, read it, reviewed it, sent me a note on how much you enjoyed it, or stopped me to tell me how it made you feel. Thank you to those that bought extra copies and gave them out to friends, family and co-workers. Thank you to those that pointed out the typos. I fixed them.
I attended the premiere of a film I wrote called Cut/Print. It was a good showing and a good time. I would like to say that it was fun to see my name up on the screen, but I had watched so many cuts of the film over the last four years that seeing it on the screen was lost on me. Too bad. I would liked to have known the feeling of seeing my name for the first time up on the silver screen. However, I did enjoy the audience’s reactions to the film.
I wrote a television pilot with milk shooting out of your nose, side-splitting comedian, J Chris Newberg. It was a great experience. We worked well together. So well, in fact, that we wrote a screenplay and another pilot right afterwards. The screenplay was an original, while the other pilot was for another creator. Of course, as it usually goes in Hollywood, we worked hard to put what was asked for in the hands of the decision makers in a timely manner then waited… forever. Still waiting.
Meanwhile, I wrote another novel and will publish it by the end of January. I need a cover, though. Not sure what I’m going to do.
I contracted with the Oakland Press as a freelance writer. I get to write about the entertainment industry in Oakland. It’s fun. In the process, I made some new friends and a little cash. Can’t beat that. Well, maybe you can. We’ll see.
I wrote a review for a book that an author read who then reached out to me and asked if I would review his book. I was honored as he’s established decently in the publishing world. Still reading the book and need to get that review out, though.
I had some epiphanies, as well. Not going to list them all here. You can probably go back and read about them in the blog archive. I also discovered that I don’t like some people and cut them out of my life, both virtual and personal. I realized, too, that there are a lot of crazy people out there with warped ideas and ideals, some informed, most uninformed. Not sure which is worse. I’ve found that I have a high opinion of myself and can be a bit arrogant. I’m okay with that. I have also used up many grains of salt over the last year.
That’s it. No big hoorah moments. Nothing that makes me look back and say, “That was a game changer.” Just life and work. Every dog has its day, so they say. Well, this dog is ready to hunt. Done with the dog day afternoons. Doggonnit! I like dogs.
That brings me to 2013. That’s weird to write and say. 2013. It’s so futuristic. I wonder at what age it doesn’t sound futuristic. Anyway, I foresee more hard work, but hopefully with better payoffs. I enjoy working. I especially enjoy working at something I like. I have another book to write in 2013, maybe two. I have a screenplay that I would like to produce or sell. I’ll shop it first. I’d like to write more for the paper, maybe land a column gig. I’d like to always be doing something. That’s it! If I were to narrow my New Year resolution down to a single sentence, it would be: always be doing something. How can anything go wrong with that?
So, I’m back in line for the ride. It’s my favorite ride at the park. Sure, it makes me sick, scared, and I want it to stop, but that’s the fun stuff. I bought this ticket and I’m going to ride this thing ’til it makes me puke!
Happy New Year!